The Non Sequitur

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  “ it's like okcupid but for cellular automata ”
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  “ Document the things you are grateful for right from your mobile phone. DO IT, FUCKER! ”
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  “ i am not a charity for your stupid ideas ”
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  “ cap'n crunch died for nothing, I suppose ”
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  “ i will not listen or help you out unless you write up some test cases for your sadness ”
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  “ it's like yelp, but for grandmas ”
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  “ my new line of twerk fitness classes for seniors ”
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  “ I wish there was a magazine made specifically for cat fanciers ”
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  “ we got Grandma, with a capital G, that rhymes with P, and that stands for POOL ”
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  “ don't judge my desire for skimming gossip columns ”
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  “ You're no spring chicken! That's for sure! ”
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  “ except for the artifacts. jpegs, etc. ”
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  “ one weird tip for an old twitter layout discovered by soccer mothers performing acts of vulgarity on their soccer implements ”
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  “ I just ejaculated blood onto my wife's sister's face. That's what you get for sleeping with your brother in law. ”
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  “ one weird old tip for a tiny belly, discovered by a mom! ”
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  “ banana biscuits for everyone ”
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  “ rubber duck waiting patiently for a twitter transplant ”
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  “ Hot yoga. Not for feeble minded poodles anymore. ”
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  “ it's like x but for y with z ”
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  “ there's a non sequitur for that! ”
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  “ Homotropic: A homotropic allosteric modulator is a substrate for its target enzyme, as well as a regulatory molecule of the enzyme's activity. It is typically an activator of the enzyme. ”
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  “ a is for Zebra, b is for Yellow, c is for Xylophone... ”