The Non Sequitur

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  “ Explore and learn from your gratitude data, so your life can be more awesome. THIS IS NOT NEGOTIABLE ”
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  “ yeah but can DeVry teach you how to dougie ”
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  “ I think we should start dividing homeless people into two groups. Homeless and wanting a home and Homeless and staying that way. That way, I can not give them a loonie and only feel bad half of the time. ”
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  “ scientists have cured balding. men can grow fros on their ass AND their head. both heads. ”
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  “ Ever since I can remember I been poppin my collar ”
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  “ you think you're the only website that can give me that barton fink feeling? ”
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  “ ev-uh-ree can go to hell ”
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  “ i can count to three. one two three. ”